Sometimes, The best way to get someones attention is to stop giving them yours.. - Wiz Khalifa.♥

Sometimes,
The best way to get someones attention
is to stop giving them yours..
- Wiz Khalifa.♥

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I don't think so!

Sincerely
Google" />

Dear Yahoo,

Have you ever heard anyone say "I Dunno, Yahoo It!"
I don't think so!

Sincerely
Google

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Dear 4th Grader,
On Facebook, your relationship status is 'It's complicated'. What he do? Steal your animal crackers?
Sincerely,
Your Mother.

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Time spent after I finish my test in class
5%; re-check answers
5%; erase answers & make them look neater

other 90%; Wait for someone else to turn in their test first

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Teenagers;.....
The most misunderstood people on the planet earth
and are treated like children but expected to act like adults.

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Boy: if only I had a dollar for every time I thought about you.
Girl: how much would you have??
Boy: ...... One dollar...
Girl: why??
Boy: 'cause you never leave my mind

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Want someone to stop texting you? Answer each of their texts with this!
Error 23: SMS Not Delivered; The number (insert your number here) has blocked you. Please Try again later

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Best ever game as a child: make sure the balloon does not touch the floor

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The awkward moment when:

Taio Cruz doesn't break your heart
Rihanna hates the way you lie
Shakiras hips lie
Katy Perry isn't living a teenage dream
Bruno Mars drops a grenade
Keshas head doesn't spin right round
Lady Gaga was not born this way
Madonna isn't hung up

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"I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best." - Marilyn Monroe

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dear guy sitting next to me,
I can see you copying my test.... Sincerely, joke's on you, I
didn't study either.

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Parents and Smart Phones
Mom: I think I keep getting messages
or missed calls or something.
Daughter: From who?
Mom: Some woman named... Betty Low?
Daughter: Um, BATTERY LOW??
Mom: Yeah, that's it!

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Hears a noise in the middle of the night
elementary school - mommy im scared!! sleeps with parents
middle school - whatever thats so stupid -worries in head
high school - pops out of bed and cracks neck- BRING IT BEOCH!
adulthood - eyes closed- i thought we settled this

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************Don't you hate it when**************
There is always that one ice cube that won't pop out of the tray.

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Lost your pen = no pen
No pen = no notes
No notes = no study
no study = fail
fail = no diploma
no diploma = no work
no work = no money
no money = no food
no food = you get skinny
skinny = then you get ugly
ugly = no lover
no lover = no marriage
no marriage = no children
no children = alone
alone = depression
depression = sickness
sickness = death
lesson: Don't loose your pen.

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You may make fun of me, drink, have sex, slack off in school, and think you're cool, but in 10 years, when you're working for me, I'm going to laugh my ass off!!
Signed,
The "not-so-popular"
" />

Dear "popular kids"
You may make fun of me, drink, have sex, slack off in school, and think you're cool, but in 10 years, when you're working for me, I'm going to laugh my ass off!!
Signed,
The "not-so-popular"

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I Will only stop loving you when
a mute guy tells a deaf guy
that a blind guy saw a legless guy
walk on water

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*********BOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!************
You just got good luck for 24hrs by reading this 'Like'. Keep it going and click the 'Like' button to spread good luck to all your friends.

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Tell a girl
She's Beautiful A Million Times
AND SHE'LL NEVER
BELIEVE YOU.
Call her ugly
even once, and she'll
NEVER FORGET .

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Heres to the girls
who don't always win.
The girls who stay up all night listening to music
that inspires them.
The girls that laugh, smile,
cry & think all on a daily basis.
The girls who love, learn & regret.
The girls who may never have it easy.
The girls who learn the hard way to live & tell about it.
The real girls.

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Hey Google.............
Why don't you let me finish what I'm typing before you start guessing after one letter....
Little cocky aren't we?

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yo, i'm hungary.
why don't you czech the fridge?
okay, i'm russian to the kitchen.
hm, maybe you'll find some turkey.
yeah, i have some, but its nasty cause its covered in a layer of greece. yuck!
yeah, i know. i think i'll just settle for a can of chile.
that sounds good, i think i'll have a canada chile as well.
denmark your name on the can.
kenya do it for me?
okay, i'm ghana do it.
thanks, i'm so tired.
iran 2 kilometers to the store today.

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the meaning of x's
x= friends
xx= close friends
xxx= i like you
xxxx= your cute
xxxxx= your hot
xxxxxx= i want you
xxxxxxx+ = i love you
no kisses = i hate you and i dont like your existance.

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You see a robber in your house ready to steal all your stuff.
60% would silently call the police for help.
25% would let them go.
15% would grab the nearest weapon and beat the living day lights out of the robber.
Like this if you are that 15%

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Di Caprio never died in Titanic, The end scene of Titanic is of him going underwater. The beginning scene of Inception is him waking up on a beach.
Its like a movie within a movie

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TODAY;
I was bored so I said "Wow, that's a weird place to put a piano." You wouldn't believe how many people looked around for a piano. I was in an elevator.

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